Dating . . . Who needs it.

I have been married once, and as you can tell from the name of my blog it didn't make it through the test of time. Or to be quite frank it was a complete fail. Starting all over is awful, really really awful! Dating is the worst at least in my opinion. While I enjoy a good meal and good company, as a single parent who has time to go out with different people over and over comparing interests. Certainly not I, nor do I want to.

Lets be honest, dating its awkward. Do I wait for him to open up my car door or do boys even do that anymore? If you are crossing the street and they put their hand slightly on your back as if to guide you, what is that. . . I am a big girl I have crossed a street before. Then of course at the end of the night when they move in for a kiss, ummmmm just because you took me to dinner doesn't earn you the right to try to shove your tongue down my throat. Then the awkward "hey I can I call you later" or "Lets do this again sometime" I may not want to do it again anytime. Unfortunately I tend to be too nice which in return gives the wrong signal. I would much rather just avoid all the above.

As for now I have called it quits on the whole relationship thing. I have come to learn that at the tender age of 25 realistically most others my age are not starting a family, where as I already have one. Men my age want to travel around with buddies, go to sporting events, and not feel tied down to responsibilities at home. Men my age are usually still in the bachelor stage and not so interested in becoming an insta dad, and it would not be fair of me to ask them to

However a girl can still dream :) One day I plan on having a fairytale romance that ends in us living happily ever after in my very cozy ranch style country home. Re-marriage . . . meh. I did the white dress thing, and it was kinda a let down. However that doesn't mean its completely out of the question, or that I want to spend my life alone. Until I can figure out what I want and more important what I need. I suggest all single parents ponder those things as well, because with children you cant mess around, its a matter of wanting it or not. If a relationship doesn't work out for a single parent the parent is not the only one who gets hurt the kids may too. I strongly believe if within 6 months you cant see yourself marrying that person one day, cut the cord and move on, any further attachments are a waste of both your time.

So until I meet that fairy tale man, I have slowly been compiling a list of criteria he must meet. Don't laugh now these things are important.

1. The Vertical Limit

Dating a shorter man than yourself is not bad unless like me you love high heels, so I need a guy who is still taller than me when I am wearing them. Looking down on my date is kinda awkward in my opinion, its one of those things I didn't know was important to me until I found myself in that situation where I felt uncomfortable wearing them.

2. The 5 year limit.

I want someone older than myself, but I am not looking for someone who looks like they could be my father. However if Richard Gere wanted to take me to dinner, you wont find me saying no. Pretty Woman sold me.

3. The J.O.B
The J.O.B gotta have it! I don't need a man who makes an insane amount of money because money does not mean much to me, I can take care of myself, but I do need a man who can take care of himself and be able to pay his own bills, also manage his money responsibly is mucho important!!!!

4. Living arrangements

Just because I live with my mother does not mean the man I date can. I live with my mother for the extra support system for my children, but that's just a temporary not an until I'm 40 just because.

5. Transportation

I am not a taxi cab for any man. I am already a designated driver for two until my tiny humans learn to drive themselves. I don't want to drive any man around on top of that. Also with that J.O.B he's gotta be paying for his own insurance.

6. Communication

I dont talk just to hear myself speak, well most the time. So talking back = good.

MOST IMPORTANT

7. Gotta Want it

I am part of a family unit. Me +2, its all or nothing, you settle with me or go play without me. Trying is not an option if a man cannot be sure he wants a family in that moment he wants to date you, don't waste your time. Don't take time away from your tiny humans for someone who is not sure, because they need you more.

8. Open Position

The father/husband role is the open position in my family, this goes with point 7, if they are still not sure of that position after 6 months, move on.

It is kind of a lot, which is why I say a girl can dream. Also because I found my McDreamy who was everything I wanted except he was missing one part, which turned into the most important part. Walking away from that was no easy task so easier to avoid it all together. So while your list may seem silly or far fetched to some, if its important to you stick to your guns.

Patience is the worst, right next to dating.